Healing Effects of Self Love

07/30/2013

As my recent theme indicates, the events of last month still linger with me as I ponder how restorative self-love can be, and how dangerous the lack of it is.

self love pamelamiles 350This topic is a current passion: to share why being gentle with ourselves as we stumble along this tumultuous path of Life is so important. When we were toddlers learning to walk, we didn’t fall a few times and then give up, thinking “that’s it! I’ll never learn” and sit on our bottoms, hoping to be carried around. No, our instinct to survive and grow is one of the strongest forces there is, and we can still tap into this inner resource.

My heart goes out for anyone who is hurting and feels they are unworthy of being here. I want to reach out to them, hovering on that precipice, and gently offer my hand. I want to bring them back to the world.

A study was done of survivors who had attempted suicide by jumping off the Brooklyn Bridge. Practically every respondent shared that seconds after jumping they could clearly see resolutions for all of the problems they had thought were insurmountable… except for the fact that they had just jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge.

SONY DSCDecades ago, when my young, short-lived, abusive marriage ended, my self-worth was the lowest ever, before or since. That angry hurtful man had so effectively beaten down my spirit (without laying a hand on me) that I felt I could hardly breathe.

I will never forget that sickening belief that I was taking up air… taking up space… and that I was utterly worthless. It was the closest I’d ever come to suicidal thinking and it was a cold, dark, terrifying place. Thankfully my inner spirit has always been strong and I had the presence of mind to seek counselling and it helped me remember how to find my way back to my Truth.

That wasn’t the only trauma I’ve overcome but it was one of the hardest. During this journey of life I have experienced awful woundedness and I personally know the glory of rising above it. And if I can do it, any one can do it! Crawling if we must, we can get back to the Light.

Helen Keller - OvercomingHaving felt that icy touch of the darkest of thoughts makes me long to reach out to others who may be lingering in that horrific loneliness. I am deeply saddened that I hadn’t been aware of Nick’s encompassing darkness. His well-hidden sadness must have been so pervasive that he completely lost sense of his value… of his pricelessness. Let us all endeavour to understand our true worth.

As Helen Keller wisely observed, “Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.”  Learning to genuinely love and accept ourselves goes a long way towards overcoming our woundedness. Let us all remember to look in the mirror with love and kindness, and to treat others gently as well. We are all on our individual paths, which are sometimes rocky, and even the smallest of kindnesses makes a huge difference. We all matter.

30 responses to Healing Effects of Self Love

  1. 

    We all matter, indeed. Another great post, Gina.
    Russ

  2. 

    I so understand what you are saying.>KB

  3. 

    Amazing amazing post. I hope you know what a gem you are. If you ever can’t remember that, call me and I’ll always be there to tell you! Lots and lots of love! :). Joanna

  4. 
    Lead Our Lives 07/30/2013 at 6:58 pm

    Beautifully, heartfelt honesty. Your path is very familiar to me. Great post.

  5. 

    yes, we are often our own critics, and the negative inner voices beat us down. One of the first steps is to believe we can be loved, a big step indeed.

  6. 

    Wow, very heart felt post. I agree with you and believe that self love is the most important thing ever! You are very strong and I admire you 🙂

  7. 

    So very much love your post and completely relate. Thank you
    Linda

  8. 
    optimisticgladness 07/30/2013 at 9:25 pm

    This is so beautiful and heartfelt. Yep, we all have to live with ourselves. I’m so glad that you see the value in you. You were made by an extraordinary God for an extraordinary purpose. Hugs.

  9. 

    Really wonderful post. There is always a solution, if we choose love. The saddest thing is that so many of us, myself included, get lost in the ego-led pain of hopelessness and feeling trapped by thoughts, emotions and life circumstances. Your post reminded me that when we decide to free ourselves, even if by suicide, a decision often presents itself. The challenge is to realise this before it’s too late.

    • 

      Thank you for this heartfelt comment. Yes too many of us feel trapped, and it is my dearest hope that we can see there are choices in every moment, and people and services out there to help. The fact that anyone would consider suicide as a way out makes me so sad and has me striving for ways to share that everyone is more important than their problems. It is a very complicated and sensitive issue, but I feel it is worth broaching the subject. It needs to be discussed. So thank you again for visiting and commenting!

  10. 

    A fantastic post Gina, it is so important to have self love. I have only really got it about 4 years ago and it has changed my life and myself.! Love reading your hearty posts!

    • 

      Hi Ute, you and me both! Learning to love myself is definitely an ongoing process – especially with regards to the mirror. 😉 But it is SO worth it. Thank you for sharing your sunny smiling self with me here. Hugs, Gina

  11. 
    jolynproject 08/07/2013 at 7:56 am

    “Crawling if we must, we can get back to the Light.” So beautiful. Again, I truly love your work. Every time I come on here is like a much-needed warm blanket on a cold night. Thanks for sharing your light! 🙂

  12. 

    Yes that particular image of the leaf with the small tear goes perfectly with that important wisdom from Rumi. And The Helen Keller quote always brings me comfort somehow. That young marriage tore my world apart, yet eventually helped lead me to the true love I now enjoy, many years later. Love of my self as a child of God and rebuilding my inner sense of worth was the road that brought me back to happiness. Thank you for your cherished visit and comment my friend. Hugs, Gina xo

  13. 

    Such a powerful post…the content…the graphics…all of it. Loving and forgiving oneself, plus realizing that others are capable of loving and forgiving each of us are key in being able to extend love and forgiveness s to others. Beautiful.

    • 

      Thank you so much Cathy! Your kindness warms my heart. I am delighted that you appreciated the images and love I poured into this post, and your kind comment really makes a difference in my world! Sending big happy hugs of gratitude your way. xo Gina

  14. 

    i simply adore your blog Gina! thanks for sharing your light …